A Boomer's Footprint

Author: D Kelly

  • A life change – what, why, when

    This week we will write out a plan in our journal for our life change by answering these three questions:

    What, Why, When

    What do we plan to change, include as much specific detail as possible. Make positive statements.

    Some examples:
    I will maximize my 401k plan this year.
    I will lose 10 pounds.
    I will change jobs.
    I will take a vacation in France.
    I will update my estate plan.
    I will practice yoga.
    Etc.

    Why are we committed to making this change. This is perhaps the most important part of the plan. Change is not easy. We will run into obstacles or even lose our motivation.

    It takes determination and consistency to stick with a plan. Understanding our motivation helps when we lose our way.

    What benefits will we receive when we achieve success in making this life change.

    List all of the benefits, again use positive language.

    For example the benefits of losing ten lbs. are:
    I will fit into one lower size.
    I will feel more confident with my looks.
    I will have more energy.
    I will be encouraged to lose ten more.
    I will be eating healthier food.
    I will take advantage of my gym membership.
    I will meet new people in my walking group.
    You name your benefits.

    When – what is your deadline to make your change. Some big life changes are best broken down into manageable steps.

    For example – if you really need to lose 50 lbs. attacking them 10 lbs. at a time is doable.

    Summarize your What, Why, and How statements on index cards, on your cell phone screen saver or other device somewhere you can read them to yourself everyday to stay focused on your plan.

  • Fulfilling a dream

    I wanted to visit Italy for many years. The day has finally arrived, I fly out tomorrow.

    This is the perfect way to follow my own advice. This 15 posts on my coaching website is about committing to solving an ongoing problem or fulfilling a passion.

    I am fulfilling a passion. My last European adventure was back in 1989 – so long ago.

    In will be posting throughout this trip – my focus is on art, architecture, food and wine. What else – I am in Italy after all. I hope to include many photos along the way.

    Stay tuned on this blog and follow along with my weekly Thursday posts.

    Dorothy

  • Making a life change

    This week we choose the topic for our big change – a life changing decision.

    To decide whether to choose a passion or a problem, let’s review our two lists from previous weeks blogs.

    In week 3 back on January 17th, we wrote out a list of our lifelong dreams. In case you didn’t finish the task or lost your sheet here is the exercise again.

    Take sometime today to complete the exercise.

    Dream worksheet – Write down your life vision in as much detail as possible.

    If time or money were not an object, what does your life look like?
    What are you doing?
    How do you spend your time?
    What are your surroundings?
    Who are you serving?
    What footprint are you leaving behind?
    What is your legacy?
    Where do you live, when do you begin, with whom do you share it?

    Your dream should include sensations – sounds, smells, sight, touch, tastes, colors, especially dream about how you will feel in your chosen life!

    Define these different aspects in your life:
    Life’s purpose
    Passions
    Personal accomplishments
    Family
    Friend / relationships
    Community
    Fun, joy, hobbies
    Adventures, experiences
    Recreation
    Health / Fitness
    Service
    Career
    Abundance
    Financial plan
    Other

    During week 26 – June 27th, we were to make a list of all of the areas of life which need fixing or improving.

    Suggested topics are:
    Cleaning up messes
    Procrastinating
    Not delegating
    Non-working relationships
    Managing time
    Work environment
    Disorganization
    Our physical environment

    While it is your choice where to begin, research shows it is hard to commit to living our dream life to live with passion if there is a major area in our lives which is holding us back. So choose wisely and remember, you can change you mind if you realize you are not ready, willing or able to pursue you first choice for your big change.

  • Problem or Passion?

    Once we are ready to commit to making a big change in life we need to decide where we can make the most difference for ourselves.

    When analyzing a change we want in our lives they fall into two categories.

    We have to determine if we have:

    A problem to solve

    OR…

    A passion to fulfill

    It can be very difficult to commit to fulfilling a passion if we have a big problem or obstacle standing in the way.

    I categorize problems into three general areas. Each topic includes a few positive terms to measure our status against.

    Health – physically fit, stress and pain free, flexible, active, vibrant,  agile, energetic, eat a healthy diet, and mentally strong

    Wealth – live with an attitude of abundance, debt free, successful,  philanthropic, prosperous, financial achievements, innovative, creative,

    Self – happy, confident, resourceful, passionate, dedicated, conscientious,  loving, free, personally responsible for self, and working relationships

    We face obstacle daily.  We have usually just finished solving a small problem, in the middle of one, or a new one is around the corner.

    But if we are facing a major problem, the challenge for the next 15 weeks is to really solve it so we can live our dream life.

    Passions are something deep inside of us dying to be expressed, to get out.

    We are all born with a true purpose  – a passion. The purpose which use our best skills, and talents.    The purpose which inspires us. A passion which touches our soul and fills our heart with joy.

    When discover our true purpose we are blessed.

    If we are ready to fulfill a passion, the challenge over the next 15 weeks is to identify the passion and create a plan to incorporate it into our lives.

    Take some time this week to sit quietly and think about where you are in life and what will take you closer to your dreams.

  • Planning a big life change

    In review, the blog posts so far have covered:

    20 weeks – discovering our biggest dreams which fulfill our passions, bring us joy and happiness and are fueled by the
    self beliefs and positive thinking that we can have a life we desire.

    15 weeks – overcoming various obstacles which stand in our way. Some topics included: negative self-talk, facing our fears, time management, non-working relationships, procrastination, and cleaning up various messes around us.

    While we may not be absolutely ready, willing and able, with the confidence and belief to make all of our dreams can come true, this next series of posts – from September 5th through December 31st is a challenge to choose one of the dreams on our list and make it happen.

    We will be making a plan to create a big change in life.

    But don’t panic – along the way we will strengthen our belief systems and work on overcoming obstacles still getting in the way.

    Often, I will suggest that you look at your calendar and realistically pick a goal or task which fits into your schedule, BUT for these next 15 weeks, I am challenging you to complete:

    one goal which will bring you the most joy, happiness, pride and satisfaction

    OR

    one goal which you may have been procrastinating about for awhile

    OR

    one goal which will fulfill a big life dream

    OR 

    one goal which will help you overcome a fear

    OR

    one goal which you decide is most important for you

    To get started each day take a few moments and day dream about what will make you happiest and jot down some notes in your journal.

  • Time management

    How many times do we say and hear others say: “I am so BUSY.”

    Life can easily become overwhelming with over commitments, work schedules, household chores, and maintaining relationships.

    So we often say – I don’t have the time as an reason or excuse for not getting things done.

    There are solutions.

    (1) Learn to say NO. Be sure you want to do something before making a commitment. Is the activity one that will bring you
    Closer to your goals and dreams. It is truly how you want to spend your time.

    (2) Prioritize your tasks. We often spend the majority of our time on the more unproductive tasks. Determine what task will provide the best results.

    (3) Spend quality time every day on your priority – even 10 minutes a day can be effective. This type of commitment works well with achieving fitness goals, cleaning up messes, preparing home cooked meals, even just sitting down and reading a book.

    (4) Eliminate time wasters. To constantly check emails, texts, and Facebook messages is very distracting and unproductive. Test yourself – using a timer determine how much real time is spent on a computer or cell phone.

  • Messes

    There are many messes in life. Today’s post focuses on the physical ones around us – at home, work, in our car, closets, etc.

    When we have chaos around us, it is difficult to focus on creating the life we dream of.

    Messes are a problem because:

    They are a distraction – to constantly be looking at unfinished projects can have a psychological effect we may not even be aware of.

    They waste time – we can spend time moving piles from one location to another without organizing the items. Also, when we cannot find things, we waste even more time looking for them – such as our keys, glasses and cell phones.

    Unsorted messes don’t go away (unless we have a magical helper).

    What to do:

    (1) make a list of every mess around you. I am not kidding. Until we know the extent of your challenge, we will not be able to get a real handle what needs to get done.

    (2) group related clean ups together. Eg. Start with a box for donations, go through rooms and discard things which you no longer want or need. Already we can lighten our load.

    (3) make a priority list. What project when completed will bring the greatest satisfaction.

    (4) allocate time everyday to work – even 10 minutes can make a difference.

  • Asking for support from your community

    Whenever we begin a process to pursue our dreams, there will always be skeptics, nay-Sayers, and sometimes negative input from family, friends, and colleagues about our new choices and likelihood for success.

    These attitudes are understandable. People are generally not comfortable with change.  Look at how long it took us to take even small steps to have the life and dreams that we want.

    It is best to let your community know up front in an organized, planned out, thoughtful, confident manner with no excuses or apologies about your commitment you made to yourself to change.

    Let them know what you are working on – a new adventure, career, or challenge, even a hobby – whatever the dream is – big or small.

    Ask them for what you need:
    Ask for the encouragement to take small steps in a new direction.
    Ask for acceptance of who you will become.
    Ask for the time and space to make small changes in your life.
    Ask for what you need from your group to become successful.
    Ask how you can help others to follow their dreams.
    Ask for forgiveness (in advance) if your new path threatens or harms them.

    Not everyone will be supportive.  So it is important to discount the negativity and doubts and stay true to yourself and follow your dreams.

    Over time when your community sees your unwavering commitment and dedication to your goals and dreams you may begin to generate more positive responses, support and feedback.

  • External Obstacles

    These next few blog posts address external obstacles that directly impact our individual lives. The topics will include our environment, time management, and our relationships.

    External obstacles can get in the way of our achieving success in reaching our goals and dreams.

    It is easy to let external obstacles become:

    -1-  Crutches – we can lean on obstacles as a reason for a failure

    -2- Excuses – we can create so many excuses for WHY, WHY, WHY.

    why we didn’t finish a project
    why we are unhappy
    why we can’t we ever find things
    why we are not achieving success

    -3- Distractions – obstacles can keep us unfocused on our priorities, our goals, our mission.

    Sorry for the short post this week, but can not let any external obstacles get in my way right now.

    I am merging the contents from a second three bedroom home into my smaller already furnished apartment.

    This means I must look at, touch and decide on everything which is in this house.  Does it stay or does it go?
    In the end, this is becoming a very therapeutic process of letting go.

    No crutch – I am relying on myself to get the job done.

    No excuses – I can not procrastinate about the task.

    No distractions – I must stay focused on my deadline.

    Using technique over the coming weeks,  we  will address external obstacles which stand in the way of making our dreams come true.

  • How to overcome procrastination

    Procrastination is such a big obstacle that I am writing an extra blog post with suggestions to overcoming this obstacle and to getting things done.

    Do not become overwhelmed with this list.  Look for the tips, which can help you the most. Remember, putting off a task, does not make it go away.

    As you begin, focus on the benefits you will receive when you stop procrastinating and start taking action.

    How to break out of the cycle of procrastination – tips from my mentor, Raymond Aaron

    Create a new mindset:

    Look at past successes – what did I learn that I can carry into this task

    Adjust your attitude – develop an “I can do it” mentality

    Develop self management skills – keep focus on task at hand

    Look at project from the goal oriented viewpoint

    Recruit support – get a fan club, an accountability partner “60% is good enough” by avoiding perfectionism, you save a lot of time.  The lower bar has a bigger chance of success.

    Remove distractions:
    • Work on messes – a clear, clean environment equals clearer mind
    • Do not multi-task – pay attention to the highest priority task only

    Getting started / Time Management:

    Create new habits.

    Focus on the most important thing first and get it done

    1- Make your to do list – list everything that needs to be done
    2- Prioritize the tasks
    3- Break a big job into manageable parts  – divide and conquer
    4- Allow enough time to complete a task – consider how much time is available and complete a small step in that timeframe
    5- Keep the list in front of you keep checking them off
    6- Work in small steps and cross items off the list
    7- Begin to accomplish just 3 small tasks each day

    Take any necessary breaks and enjoy them.

    After your success:

    End of day preparation – review what was accomplished, make list of things to accomplish the next day – set the real
    priorities and do them first.

    Reward yourself for even the smallest effort/

    Last tip from The ultimate solution by David Allen

    DO IT NOW!– the 2 minute rule – if something can be accomplished in two minutes of less Do it Now.  What takes more time – record it for later.