A Boomer's Footprint

Tag: change

  • Me Me Me Me Me Me Me…….

    Let’s Soar.

    Baby Boomers – here’s the first post from my Then and Now series: MY WAY.

    There is a lot of verbiage floating around that we were the ME generation. We wanted to feel better and to have dreams that were actually attainable. We wanted a great life and we wanted work to be FUN. We brought out new energy and ideas.

    And luckily for the world, we did it, we believed in ME.  Our self-focus contributed to notable advancements I’ll be discussing in the coming weeks.

    Also trending is the comment we didn’t live up to our potential.  In fact, this theme ranks quite high in internet searches when checking out “baby boomers”. Of course many of these articles are written by millennials so give it the weight it deserves. There can be a lot of conversation around this idea.

    We believed in and worked towards:

    Idealism – My way meant we had an “I can do anything” attitude.We did a lot but now more than ever, we need to reconnect with our idealism as we make important choices and decisions about how we live in this second phase of life. Do we settle for our fitness level as is or strengthen and build our stamina, eat better, become more active? Do we become isolated or  enlarge our friends and associates base?  Do we continue to work, retire, or start our own business? Time to relocate, to buy up or downsize?

    Is now the time to re-invent ourselves, to chase our dreams or to give up on potential opportunities? What can we do?

    Openness to change – If you don’t like something you can change it. Part of the my way attitude. Like many kids we weren’t interested in the way our parents lived. We wanted something new and we were willing to go for it – to change. Future posts will address some of these changes. But for now are we ready to accept the challenge to change again.  Life is constantly changing around us so we can choose to adapt or be left behind. Sorry to say as we age there will be many adjustments needed.

    Self-empowerment – We began listening to our inner voice. We sought to discover who we were and how we could improve ourselves.  This concept is very relevant if we are ready to re-invent ourselves.

    Anti-authoritarianism – We became disillusioned with authority. We protested, we sat-in, we challenged the status quo. We all have our own opinions about the current leadership and whether the rhetoric is speaking to and for us.  But the reality is, we must set our own course and make our lives work for us.  There is no better time to become more vocal and active in the political arena at any level. To make our voices be heard.  While AARP does a good job addressing some big issues, it is irresponsible of us to give up our own power. We can fight for what is correct and just.

    Has our power been taken away or have we given it away?  Either way take some kind of action today. Reclaim and recommit to your power and use it for the betterment of yourself and others. This is a big component in the up and coming ebook entitled “My Way” along with more information and examples on the topic.

    Examples of Action Steps:

    Look at your senator’s or representative’s website to see what positions they are taking (I just looked at Feinstein’s sight and see there is a link to request a government grant!)

    OR search AARP – click the menu bar. There are many resources available. Such as – 10 Best Part-Time Jobs for Post-Retirement.

    OR challenge yourself with a personal goal on your procrastination list.

    What one goal can you accomplish in the next 30 days?

    Here’s what I am up to:

    -1- I continue to work on my fitness mainly strength and stamina.  In addition to my fitbit steps, 5 days a week I follow a TV yoga shows like Power Yoga or Wai Lana Yoga – all for free and in the comfort of my living room floor.

    -2- I am Purging!  My house is full of piles everywhere.  Some because there is no where to store them, others because of my small pack rat mentality.  My challenge is 30 projects in 90 days.  I am posting some videos on my business facebook page.

    https://www.facebook.com/Dorothy-Kelly-Proud-Boomer-and-Coach-107677419260985/

    -3- In collaboration with others I’m building a Boomer Movement.  The website BayAreaisBooming.com will launch this winter.  The focus is to “Lead a Conversation” on aging in the San Francisco / Bay Area.  Let’s admit it, we are there.  So how do we want to do it??? This is a replicatable model for our regions in the country.

    Big challenges but I have an “I can do it Attitude”.  What about you?

     

  • Join Me for a 90 day Challenge

     

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    The sky suggest limitless of  possibilities. We can soar. What can you accomplish if you try? What change can you commit to that will Make a Significance Difference for you?

    Boomers: it’s time to “Make a Difference for Ourselves!”

    Now I know what you thinking. Many believe that as boomers were / are selfish, self-indulgent and self-centered.  But WE know that is not the whole story. WE just wanted to do things “My Way.”

    While we have succeeded in many areas in our lives, we all have something/s on our plate unfinished, unresolved. So I propose tackling one of these issues NOW.

    Imagine that in 90 days you can overcome the biggest challenge you’ve procrastinated about you for ages.

    Here’s how to get started

    Step 1 – Dig out your journal, dust it off and get going.

    If you don’t have a journal, use a yellow tablet, copy paper or any paper scrap available. (Kidding – spring for a nice book, one you are happy to write in every day.) We will use the journal to record our 2016 BIG goal and track our progress while reaching it.

    As you read the list, write down all of the statements in your journal which are true for you. Be honest. This info is for your eyes only. Don’t get overwhelmed if you are writing down a LOT of statements. We will tackle each challenges one at a time.

    One or more items on the following list may be your issue OR you already know “What It Is” because, you’ve been thinking about it for years.

    Here goes:

    I am (_____) pounds overweight

    Run a 5K, I can’t even run five blocks

    I need more sleep

    I take so many drugs

    I am in a rut eating unhealthy foods

    I just can’t remember things

    I have many negative thoughts

    I’m too tired

    I can’t get off the couch

    I am depressed

    I feel lazy, unmotivated

    I am uninspired

    I am discouraged

    I don’t have enough time

    I’m a sandwich between my parents and my children

    I’m too old to learn new tricks

     

    I am sick of my job

    I wish I had a job

    I dream of owning my own business

    Retire, retire with what money

    I have too much month at the end of my money

     

    My house is a mess

    I have too much stuff

    I can never find anything

    I am a shopaholic

    How did you do?

    1-10 items – excellent considering we have lived 60+ years.  That one issue every six years. I wonder which one was neglected before age 5!

    10 – 15 items – oops – somewhere you lost your way

    15 + items – you’ve got serious work to do. But don’t be discouraged, change is possible. I’m going to show you how.

    Step 2 – Choose your big challenge. 

    Now, pick just ONE item from your journal to work on.

    This summer 2016 – over the next 90 days, we are going all in to overcome this issue – no excuses – pick your BIGGEST CHALLENGE. The thing that’s been nagging you for the longest. The thing that you said to yourself for so long if only I ………….

    Step 3 – Sign up for my newsletter. Automatically receive my blog posts every few day where I share tips and techniques to help you succeed. I will also share my personal journey.

    Take two days to psyche yourself up. How to Create your plan arrives on Thursday. You can also follow me on twitter for daily tips.

    Good Luck.

     

     

     

     

  • New habit review

    We began our new habit after the Oct 24th blog, over 40 days ago. How is the progress?

    If you stuck to your plan for at least half of those days you should congratulate your self. Now you may think, I am not giving you much credit but we must realize that change is hard. At least you should have learned whether this is a correct habit for you at this time of your life.

    So even if, for example, getting a new job was your goal but you just learned of a medical condition which requires a treatment plan, perhaps the stability of a routine, a sure paycheck and medical benefits became a more important priority for now.

    This tells us we are not always right the first time around when choosing a goal and also, things come up with may take precedence in life.

    But what can we learn from our 15 or so days of a practicing a new habit:

    -1- we discovered what time of day for our action works best in our schedules.

    -2- we discovered if we have the tools and skills needed to adopt a new habit.

    -3- we discovered if we earned any benefit from adopting this new habit.

    -4- we did take “some” action

    -5- we did not give up after missing some day of action

    -6- only we know if you gave accomplishing the goal our best effort and life got in the way.

    Going forward we must determine if we made the right choice for this new habit. If yes, continue with the plan with a few tweaks, if necessary. If no, choose a new goal and get started.

    You can review the Oct 24th blog post – 8 steps to create a new habit.

  • 8 steps to create a new habit

    8 Sure fire ways to create a new habit:

    Are you determined to make this change in your life? The funny thing is that the word DETERMINED is what it takes to be successful.

    You must commit from your heart that you want to succeed. Some changes may require you to form a new habit.

    Our days are run by our habits – the time we wake up in the morning, the order we put on our socks and shoes, our regular driving routes,how we organize our work desk.

    This practice works for us because we don’t have to think about how to perform these regular tasks. Reaching this stage of “just doing” is the goal when starting a new habit. At first, we may have to remind, encourage and even force ourselves to do something we “say we really, really want”. But eventually you will succeed!

    1. Know your WHY. This is your desire. It includes a list of benefits you will receive from adopting the new habit. The reason must be strong and clear. The deeper the emotion associated with the desire to change, the greater the motivation, greater the opportunity for success. It will be your inspiration and motivation. Read this statement everyday to remind yourself why you are making the commitment.

    2. WHAT is your goal? Write it down. It should be detailed, measurable and include a deadline. Goals should be stated in the present tense. The brain believes that present tense statement is already true. So your brain will look for ways to make it happen.

    3. Use of powers of affirmations, visualization and meditation to keep you focused on your goal. Read your goal statement everyday to remind yourself why you are making a commitment to change.

    4. Commit to 30 days. Habits take at least 30 days to stick. By stick I mean become rote. This is a process of retraining the brain to adopt a new activity or way to do a task.

    5. Make it regular. Do your new habit the same time everyday. Consistency is the critical to make a new habit. Write it in your schedule and stick to it.

    6. Start with something simple. If you have a big goal, break it down into smaller steps. While it may take longer to accomplish the big goal, your will experience success along the way and not be overwhelmed at so big a challenge.

    7. Plan ahead. If your goal requires props, have them ready to use before the scheduled time to do the task. Don’t waste time “Getting Ready”, then run out of time to do the activity.

    8. Accept a bump in the road. Be realistic about having an immediate success. Accept it if you miss a day. Do not use it as a reason to quit. For your first goal, choose something which you have a good chance of
    accomplishing. You want to have a success right away.

    Good Luck.

  • Setting goals

    Once we have decided on our big change, it is time to set the goals to make the change happen.

    One popular method to set goals is S.M.A.R.T.

    Specific – This part focuses on the five W questions:
    • What – what exactly do I want to accomplish?
    • Why – list the specific reasons benefits of accomplishing the goal
    • Who – who is involved in the process.
    • Where – identify the location
    • Which – identify requirements and constraints

    Measurable – How will you measure the your success of reaching your goal? Use this tool to stay on track and remember it is okay to adjust your goal as you evaluate your progress.

    Attainable – What are the actions are necessary to achieve your goal? As you set your goals you may need to develop new attitudes and skills to be able to achieve them. By breaking down bigger goals into smaller steps may enable us to make progress.

    Relevant – How will my goals help me to achieve my big change? Don’t become distracted by efforts that are not aligned with your desired result.

    Time-bound – Set one or more target dates for completion. This “by when” deadlines, dates and frequency.

    Write down your goal on a device, index card, calendar – keep somewhere it is always visible and you can refer to it daily. Taking a step everyday may ensure you best success.

  • Scusi, I missed the publish button last week.

    I wrote my post last Thursday as usual but somehow missed the post button. I am sorry – two times now since last November I missed a post date – not too bad.

    Perhaps it is a good thing because this week I wanted to go off my 52 week outline and review an important point. So I hope you read these two posts together.

    (By the way, I am following one of my dreams and am sitting in the town of Poppi – Tuscan region of Italy, enjoying a delicious glass of red wine and writing so I am nine hours ahead of my hometown of San Francisco right now.)

    I wanted to write a bit more from last week’s post about WHY we are committing to make a big change in our lives.

    If you have been following along since last November when I began this journey, you may remember my initial writings. I believe and support you in following your dreams.

    We deserve:
    To be happy
    To pursue our passions
    To enjoy life’s moments
    To be free
    To have all that we want from life
    To live with joy in our hearts
    To have abundance in our lives

    Yes, life has struggles and obstacle to overcome. We had them in the past, we have them now and we will have them in the future. But this should not prevent us from “going for our dreams.”

    Everything we dream about for our lives is available waiting for us make it happen.

    We simply need to trust the universe and remain open to all of the possibilities.

    ASK, BELIEVE, RECEIVE!

  • A life change – what, why, when

    This week we will write out a plan in our journal for our life change by answering these three questions:

    What, Why, When

    What do we plan to change, include as much specific detail as possible. Make positive statements.

    Some examples:
    I will maximize my 401k plan this year.
    I will lose 10 pounds.
    I will change jobs.
    I will take a vacation in France.
    I will update my estate plan.
    I will practice yoga.
    Etc.

    Why are we committed to making this change. This is perhaps the most important part of the plan. Change is not easy. We will run into obstacles or even lose our motivation.

    It takes determination and consistency to stick with a plan. Understanding our motivation helps when we lose our way.

    What benefits will we receive when we achieve success in making this life change.

    List all of the benefits, again use positive language.

    For example the benefits of losing ten lbs. are:
    I will fit into one lower size.
    I will feel more confident with my looks.
    I will have more energy.
    I will be encouraged to lose ten more.
    I will be eating healthier food.
    I will take advantage of my gym membership.
    I will meet new people in my walking group.
    You name your benefits.

    When – what is your deadline to make your change. Some big life changes are best broken down into manageable steps.

    For example – if you really need to lose 50 lbs. attacking them 10 lbs. at a time is doable.

    Summarize your What, Why, and How statements on index cards, on your cell phone screen saver or other device somewhere you can read them to yourself everyday to stay focused on your plan.

  • Planning a big life change

    In review, the blog posts so far have covered:

    20 weeks – discovering our biggest dreams which fulfill our passions, bring us joy and happiness and are fueled by the
    self beliefs and positive thinking that we can have a life we desire.

    15 weeks – overcoming various obstacles which stand in our way. Some topics included: negative self-talk, facing our fears, time management, non-working relationships, procrastination, and cleaning up various messes around us.

    While we may not be absolutely ready, willing and able, with the confidence and belief to make all of our dreams can come true, this next series of posts – from September 5th through December 31st is a challenge to choose one of the dreams on our list and make it happen.

    We will be making a plan to create a big change in life.

    But don’t panic – along the way we will strengthen our belief systems and work on overcoming obstacles still getting in the way.

    Often, I will suggest that you look at your calendar and realistically pick a goal or task which fits into your schedule, BUT for these next 15 weeks, I am challenging you to complete:

    one goal which will bring you the most joy, happiness, pride and satisfaction

    OR

    one goal which you may have been procrastinating about for awhile

    OR

    one goal which will fulfill a big life dream

    OR 

    one goal which will help you overcome a fear

    OR

    one goal which you decide is most important for you

    To get started each day take a few moments and day dream about what will make you happiest and jot down some notes in your journal.

  • Eliminating obstacles

    The process to overcome our fears, doubts and negative self- talk is not easy.  Many of these obstacles have built up over a long period of time.

    We identify with them. We believe they are who we are, who we will always be.

    If limiting beliefs, fears and doubts are standing in the way of achieving your goals and dreams, then what is there benefit,
    how are they serving you? If fears and beliefs are bringing us the life we desire, then we must make a change.

    Change takes strength, courage, consistent and regular action.

    Most important, however, is this fact – if you are not ready or able to change – change will not happen.

    When you are ready to change, begin by taking small steps to attain your goals and dreams.

    To start, pick one small obstacle to work on – either a fear, a doubt or a limiting belief. Focus your energy and attention on it.

    Use on of the options from the last three blogs to work on your issue.

    Picture how your life will be different without this obstacle. What thing can you accomplish, what activity can you try, what action can you take?

    Will you climb a mountain, change jobs, end a relationship, begin a new hobby, work on your health or financial picture?

    Keep working on your changing process. Don’t let small setbacks derail  your progress. Keep at it, keep fighting, keep trying.

    Once you have succeeded in overcoming one small roadblock, use the feelings of accomplishment to propel you onto your next hurdle.

    You can do it!

  • Changing bad habits

    One reason we are stuck with negative or limiting beliefs, doubts and fears is because they become engrained in who we are.

    They become habits. We have many beneficial habits in our lives, which make getting through each day happen effortlessly.

    However, some habits stand in the way of our achieving the dreams and success we want for ourselves in life.

    Some of these bad habits are hard to break because they become enjoyable and we want to keep them.  This is especially true
    about our relationships with food.

    We can close out eyes and vividly remember the smells, tastes, and textures of many foods that we are “addicted” to. Regardless of how many times we read about the harmful effects of these foods, We can not stop eating them!

    According to wikipedia, a bad habit is a negative behavior pattern. Behaviors are acquired and develop over time. Habits are actions we take over and over again. Habits become unconscious, automatic thoughts and actions we take when we encounter a situation, which are based on prior experiences. With bad habits, these actions may not give us a desired or different result from the past.

    Changing a bad habit is possible. We can learn what it takes and put new actions into practice in your daily life to change the
    engrained habits of a lifetime. We can even learn to change the nature programmed into your genes, but it will take determined
    actions, over and over again, to reprogram your mind and change yourself.

    Here are 7 ways to break a bad habit:

    -1- put it in writing – use your journal to write about a bad habit – include exactly what is the habit, what do you do before engaging in the habit, what benefits does the habit bring you (this is important because we usually experience something satisfying from the habit), and what is an alternative habit choice.

    -2- make it conscious – become aware of when we engage in the habit, such as picking at nails, watching TV, eating junk food, running late for an appointment, procrastinating, etc.

    So many habits are mindless, routine, we don’t THINK about doing them. We can focus on our choices and decide if they are giving us the results we desire.

    -3- choose an alternative behavior – decide what to do instead. By being prepared with healthy food alternatives, we are less likely to reach for an unhealthy one.

    -4- choose positive thoughts – use positive language to adopt change. Instead of saying – “I am not eating any junk food today”. State – “Today I will eat a piece of fruit for snack.” Then of course, do it!

    -5- have patience – changing a long standing bad habit is not easy and it will take time.  Take small steps on a regular basis.

    Use the phrase  “Just this one time” and choose the side small salad instead of the order the french fries (So often “just this one time” for fries is every time!).

    -6- engage an ally – identify a friend with a similar bad habit and work together to change.

    -7- Reward yourself – the Pavlov method can work. We can focus on what reward we will earn for sticking to our goal.

    Choose an appropriate one – when You choose to eat fruit every day for snack, do you want to sabotage your efforts with a big banana split at week’s end?

    In summary, bad habits, which have developed over time can be changed.  Take regular, consistent action to succeed.